American Endings

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Pancake
We watched the recent re-make of Pride and Prejudice recently, and were very much surprised to learn the movie had been made in a "regular version," and in a version featuring an "alternative American ending."

All through the movie I couldn’t help thinking what this alternative American ending might be.

Maybe they’d stand up hands on hearts and give some patriotic speech about democracy and the need to free the world?

Would  Elisabeth and Mr. Darcy leave for America in search of a better world?

Maybe there’d be a good shooting and a carriage chase?

We saw the alternative American ending, and it was of course none of the above. Instead, it featured a sickening sweet romantic screen with Elisabeth, Mr. Darcy, torch lights, amber tones, in short, as if someone would have set out a very romantic scene and poured Marble Syrup all over it.

Brrr.